(Al Yankovic) When we first met she seemed perfectly normal I never dreamed she'd make my life so hard You see, my baby, she started to change Started lookin' kinda strange Wearin' all that white makeup and those black leotards Well, I guess she kept her little secret pretty well Now ever since I learned the horrible truth You know my life has been a living hell That's right, you see... She never told me she was a mime She never told me she was a mime, oh no Actin' like she's trapped inside a big glass box all the time She never told me, she never told me she was a... Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma-mime I wish we both could just talk it all over But my baby won't even make a sound Now she makes everybody sick Doin' that pantomime shtick Even our old friends have stopped coming around Well, my parents can't stand her and the neighbors hate her guts She's really, really embarassing me...this silent treatment's driving me nuts You see... She never told me she was a mime She never told me she was a mime, oh no Now she's actin' like she's trapped inside a big glass box all the time What a crime She never told me (she never told me) she never told me she was a mime She walks against the wind everywhere we go Stops at every corner, gotta put on a show Carries 'round a picture of Marcel Marceau Always was the quiet type, but how was I to know? She never told me she was a mime She never told me she was a mime, oh no Actin' like she's trapped inside a big glass box all the ti-yi-yi-yi-yi-ime She never told me, she never told me she was a mime