Mom and dad are goin' out for the evening And you're stuck inside the house all alone That's when you decided it might be fun to harass someone Dial a random number up on your telephone You ask if their refrigerator is running Then you tell 'em they should go out and catch it Buddy, if they ever figured out where you were callin' 'em from They'd come and bust your head right in with a ratchet Listen to me Don't go makin' phony calls Please stick to the seven-digit numbers you're used to I know that you think it's funny drivin' folks up the wall But it's really gettin' old fast Little Melvin has a natural obsession Askin' for Prince Albert in a can He gets a kick each time he makes a collect call To some guy he doesn't know who lives in Japan He's callin' strangers up at three in the morning Gives 'em pizza pie delivery at four He won't be laughin when they're tracin' his line One day the phone police will be there at his door Yo, hear me
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