Seein' that tomorrow's my birthday Happy birthday to you Seein' that this is the final night of my 29th year Happy birthday to you Seein' that all my fuckin' friends were assembled here to greet me Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you I'm gonna tell you all the story of my life I'm gonna tell you all the story of my life My daddy knew Dixie Howell, He used to cut his hair Daddy had a shop in Tuscaloosa, And Howell was on a team up there When I was born, Daddy put a football in my cradle Later on, he put a football helmet in my bed So when he died I put a razor in his coffin And poured Vaseline all over his head. Magnolias, magnolias, magnolias they had The people come from mile around To follow Daddy's coffin to the graveyard And put poor Daddy's body in the ground Magnolias, you should have smelled the magnolias, Daddy Don't you wish it was me layin' there instead? But tomorrow I will be sober, Daddy, And you will still be dead