Playing on his slide trombone in a certain monotone He was known as Mister Monotony Any pleasant interlude that would mean a change of mood Didn't go with Mister Monotony Sometimes he would change the key But the same dull melody Would emerge from Mister Monotony Folks for miles would run away Only one prefer'd to stay She would come around and say "Have you got any monotony today?" They got married as they should and around the neighborhood She was known as Missus Monotony They were happy as can be and they raised a family Six or seven little monotonies From another village came a snappy clarineter She heard him play and strange to say she liked him better 'Twas the end of Mister Monotony She refused him when he tried Bringing her back to his side She just answered when he cried: "Have you got any monotony today?" "Haven't got any monotony today Can't play Today Haven't got any monotony today" [Alternate lines from the soundtrack:] Soon there came another bride And she snuggled to his side But he answered when she cried: