Oh, this is a story 'bout a guy named Al And he lived in a sewer with his hamster pal But the sanitation workers really didn't approve So he packed up his accordion and had to move To a city in Ohio where he lived in a tree And he worked in a nasal decongestant factory And he played on the company bowling team And every single night he had a strange, recurring dream Where he was wearing leiderhosen in a vat of sour cream But that's really not important to the story Well, the very next year he met a dental hygenist With a spatula tattoed on her arm (on her arm) But he didn't keep in touch, then he lost her number Then he got himself a job on a tater tot farm And he spent his life savings on a split-level cave 20 miles below the surface of the Earth (of the Earth) And he really makes a mighty fine jelly bean and pickle sandwich For what it's worth Then one day Al was in the forest, trying to get a tan When he heard the tortured screaming of a funny little man He was caught in a bear trap and Al set him free And the guy that he rescued was as grateful as can be And it turns out he's a big-shot producer on TV So he gave Al a contract and what do you know? Now he's got his own very Weird Al Show!