Ladies and gentlemen, May I have your attention, perlease? Are your nostrils aquiver and tingling as well At that delicate, luscious ambrosial smell? Yes they are, I can tell. Well, ladies and gentlemen, That aroma enriching the breeze Is like nothing compared to its succulent source, As the gourmets among you will tell you, of course. Ladies and gentlemen, You can't imagine the rapture in store -- (Indicating the shop) Just inside of this door! (Beating his usual drum) There you'll sample Mrs. Lovett's meat pies, Savory and sweet pies, As you'll see. You who eat pies, Mrs. Lovett's meat pies Conjure up the treat pies Used to be! (TOBIAS and customers sing, overlapping) 1ST MAN: Over here, boy, how about some ale? 2ND MAN: Let me have another, laddie! 1ST WOMAN: Tell me, are they flavorsome? 2ND WOMAN: They are. 3RD WOMAN: Isn't this delicious? TOBIAS ( To 2ND MAN): Right away. 4THMAN: Could we have some service over here, boy? 4TH WOMAN: Could we have some service, waiter? 3RD MAN: Could we have some service? 2ND and 3RD WOMAN: Yes, they are. 1ST MAN: God, that's good! 2ND MAN: What about that pie, boy? 1ST WOMAN: Tell me, are they spicy? 2ND WOMAN: God, that's good! 5TH WOMAN: How much are you charging? TOBIAS: Thruppence. 3RD WOMAN: Yes, what about the pie, boy? 4TH WOMAN: I never tasted anything so ... 1ST and 5TH woman: Thruppence? 5TH MAN: Thruppence for a meat pie? 1ST and 2ND man: Where's the ale I asked you for, boy? TOBIAS: |_ Ladies and gentlemen -- ! MRS. LOVETT (Ringing a bell to attract TOBIAS 's attention) Toby! (She starts into the garden with a tray of pies)(To a customer) TOBIAS: Coming! 'Scuse me . . . MRS. LOVETT (Indicating a beckoning customer): Ale there! TOBIAS: Right, mum! (He runs inside, picks up a jug of ale, whisks back out into the garden and starts filling tankards) MRS. LOVETT: Quick, now! CUSTOMER (Licking their fingers): God, that's good! MRS. LOVETT (A bundle of activity, serving pies, collecting money, giving orders, addressing each of the patrons individually and with equal insincerity): Nice to see you, dearie . .. How have you been keeping? ... Cor, me bones is weary! Toby -- ! (Indicating a customer) One for the gentleman . . . Hear the birdies cheeping -- Helps to keep it cheery . . . (Spying the BEGGAR WOMAN) Toby! Throw the old woman out! customers: God, that's good! (TOBIAS shoos the BEGGAR WOMAN away, but she soon comes back, sniffing) MRS. LOVETT (To other customers, without breaking rhythm): What's your pleasure, dearie? ... No, we don't cut slices .. . Cor, me eyes is bleary! . . . (As TOBIAS is about to pour for a plastered customer) Toby! None for the gentleman! . . . I could up me prices -- I'm a little leery ... Business Couldn't be better, though -- CUSTOMER: God, that's good! MRS. LOVETT: Knock on wood. (She does) TODD (Leaning out of window): Psst! MRS. LOVETT (To a customer): Excuse me ... TODD: Psst! MRS. LOVETT ( To TOBIAS): Dear, see to the customers. TODD: Psst! MRS. LOVETT (Moving toward him): Yes, what, love? Quick, though, the trade is brisk. TODD: But it's six o'clock! MRS. LOVETT: So it's six o'clock. TODD: It was due to arrive At a quarter to five -- MRS. LOVETT: TODD: And it's six o'clock! I've been waiting all day! But it should have been here By now! And it's probably already Down the block! It'll be here, it'll be here! Have a beaker of beer And sto