I'm not scared, but this is happening I'm not afraid, but this is real It all comes at once From every single direction This time I'm not sleeping at all How could this be real I've failed you I was lying when I said I was looking north I was too scared to show what I am Bear with me this is all I have left This night be more than a single conversation It's been dancing around in my head For quite some time Just the though Of cleaning up myself I stare at the wall Watching my time float away It's all been a blur And nothing will change I was lying This is defeat