Written by John Curulewski Lead vocals by John Curulewski Don't sit on the Plexiglas toilet Said the momma to her son Wipe the butt clean with the paper Make it nice for everyone But don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah A boy of 5 stands close to the toilet Holds the lid up with one hand Won't let go the lid for fear that On his banana it will land Don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah Boy goes up he eats the enchilada With the sauce that burns the heart Family comes to visit family Momma says don't belch and fart Don't sit on the Plexiglas toilet Said the momma to her son Wipe the butt clean with the paper Make it nice for everyone But don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah Everybody Sing! Don't sit on the Plexiglas toilet Said the momma to her son Wipe the butt clean with the paper Make it nice for everyone But don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah Don't sit on the Plexiglas toilet Said the momma to her son Wipe the butt clean with the paper Make it nice for everyone But don't sit down on the Plexiglas toilet yeah