I smoked Consulates and Park Drive, drank Nookie Brown Learned how to skive Polo mints to hide my breath from my mum Did a little weed cuz it felt like fun Did a little bit of speed if my friend had some Nicked Volkswagen badges I'm a Beastie Boys son Me so horny, me so young and I still get my washing done Auntie Joan died of cancer God didn't have an answer Rhythm was a dancer Any room for a chancer? That's me in the corner, thanks sir! I wore astute track suits, British Nike shoes, Kangol hat like LL Cool's Before I was 'avin it, 'avin it large They nicked the BMX from out my garage Knew it was Theo from off the estate cuz every time he'd see me, he'd smile like we were mates From then on in I'd have to walk to me Nan's And I'd dream my dreams through a sea of prams Like a hooligan on the football stands And I'd throw the v's to Leeds and West Ham Then I ran, I ran so far away down Scotia Road to a taxi bay Then I ran again cuz I couldn't pay, a Muslim didn't get his fare that day I apologise today Things are better when they start That's how the 80s broke my heart And who are you calling poof? You like Wham, man, I hate that stuff And then my grandad died and left a hole in the family and lots of women had to nanny me School was a laugh, they didn't have ADD, thick was the term they used for me (over and over) Repeatedly (over and over) Take my breath away take my breath away Bidly bidly bidly bom Pass it on the left hand side, right turn, Clive That girl in the fourth year, got pregnant and she was raised Catholic, brilliant! I cried, she cried, we cried, our youth died Drank cider in the cemetery The year above us had discovered E and I said it weren't for me ?12.50? I could rob me mum's purse and buy one up Torquay Met a girl on Monday, drank fizzy pop on Tuesday Fingered her on Wednesday and on Thursday and Friday and on Saturday Dumped by Sunday Things are better when they start That's how the 80s broke my heart The wonder years, I've played my part That's how the 80s broke my heart Like I said, I lost my virginity to a girl called Anne-Marie, well she said she fancied me And then she said "fuck me" and I thought 'fuck me, I'm all talk and it'll be over too quickly' And it was but I couldn't care less, I'd seen a girl's bra and made a mess on her dress, oh yes! You're now rocking with the best, second person in my year that had seen a breast I'm in my 30s now and I'm still impressed Where are the Falklands mum? And what have they done? Where do girls come from? Where do girls come from? Where do girls come from? It's the 80s, what you looking at, ya mong? So young, so long, so young, so long Too short, so long What you looking at ya mong? Too short, so long, too short, so long So long.