Aarrhhh...Aarrhhh...Aarrhhhhh...Aarrrrrhhhhhhh!!! We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, "We don't do anything!" Well I've never been to Cleveland And I've never been to Denver And I've never buried treasure in St. Louis or St. Paul And I've never been to Moscow And I've never been to Tampa And I've never been to Boston in the Fall. We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, "We don't do anything!" And I've never hoisted the mainstay And I've never swabbed the poop deck And I've never peered to starboard cuz I've never sailed at all And I've never walked the gangplank And I've never owned a parrot And I've never been to Boston in the Fall (Burp) We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, "We don't do anything!" Well I've never plucked a rooster And I'm not to good at pinball And I've never thrown my mashed potaters up against the wall And I've never kissed a chipmunk And I've never gotten headlice And I've never been to Boston in the fall Who be this man of Relient K? And why be he so full of contridiction?> We don't know what he did But we're down with Captain Kidd We don't wake up before lunch But we all eat Captain Crunch We don't smoke We don't chew We watch Captain Kangaroo And I've never licked a sparkplug And I've never sniffed a stinkbug And I've never painted daisies on a big red rubber ball And I've never bathed in yogurt And I've never looked good in leggings And I've never been to Boston in the fall!!! (Spit.."Ka-ting!!!") We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, "We don't do anything!" We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, "We don't do anything!"