Mother: (turning off radio) Liberal rubbish! Klaus! Klaus: Yeah? Mother:Whaddaya want with yer jugged fish? Klaus:'Alibut. Mother:The jugged fish IS 'alibut! Klaus:Well, what fish 'ave you got that isn't jugged? Mother:Rabbit. Klaus:What, rabbit fish? Mother:Uuh, yes...it's got fins.... Klaus:Is it dead? Mother:Well, it was coughin' up blood last night. Klaus:All right, I'll have the dead unjugged rabbit fish. Voice over: one dead unjugged rabbit fish later... Klaus:(putting down his knife and fork) Well, that was really 'orrible. Mother:Aaw, you're always complainin'! Klaus:Wha's for afters? Mother:Rat cake, rat sorbet, rat pudding, or strawberry tart. Klaus:(eyes lighting up) Strawberry tart? Mother:Well, it's got *some* rat in it. Klaus:'Ow much? Mother:Three. A lot, really. Klaus:Well, I'll have a slice without so much rat in it. Voice over: One slice of strawberry tart without so much rat in it later... Klaus:(putting down fork and knife) Appalling. Mother:Naw, naw, naw! Son: (coming in the door) 'Ello Mum. 'Ello Dad. Klaus:'Ello son. S: There's a dead bishop on the landing, dad! Klaus:Really? Mother:Where's it from? Son: Waddya mean? Mother:What's its diocese? Son: Well, it looked a bit Bath and Wells-ish to me... Klaus:(getting up and going out the door) I'll go and have a look. Mother:I don't know...kids bringin' 'em in here.... Son: It's not me! Mother:I've got three of 'em down by the bin, and the dustmen won't touch 'em! Klaus:(coming back in) Leicester. Mother:'Ow d'you know? Klaus:Tattooed on the back o' the neck. I'll call the police. Mother:Shouldn't you call the church? Son: Call the church police! Klaus:All right. (shouting) The Church Police! (sirens racing up, followed by a tremendous crash) (the church police burst in the door) Detective: What's all this then, Amen! Mother:Are you the church police? All the police officers: (in unison) Ho, Yes! Mother:There's another dead bishop on the landing, vicar sargeant! Detective: Uh, Detective Parson, madam. I see... suffrican, or diocisian? Mother:'Ow should I know? Detective: It's tatooed on the back o' their neck. (spying the tart) 'Ere, is that rat tart? Mother:Yes. Detective: Disgusting! Right! Men, the chase is on! Now we should all kneel! (they all kneel) All: O Lord, we beseech thee, tell us 'oo croaked Lester! (thunder) Voice of the Lord: The one in the braces, he done it! Klaus: It's a fair cop, but society's to blame. Detective: Agreed. We'll be charging them too. Klaus:I'd like you to take the three boddlabin into consideration. Detective: Right. I'll now ask you all to conclude this harrest with a hymn. All: All things bright and beautiful, All creatures great and small, All things wise and wonderful, The church has nigged them all. Amen.
https://primoaccordo.net/muppets/the-dead-bishop-on-the-landing-sketch.htm