Oop in belfry, verger stands, Pullin' pud with grimy 'ands Oop in pulpit parson yells, "stop pullin' pud, pull fookin' bells" Ring the bell verger, ring, ring, ring Perhaps the congregation will condescend to sing Perhaps the village organist sitting on his stool will play upon his organ and not upon his tool! Down in the belfry chauffeur lies, Vicars wife between his thighs Voice from the pulpit sounds afar, "Stop pushin' wife, start pushin' car!" Oop in control tower operator sits, Girl on knee, playing with tits In cooms foreman, face in smiles "Stop twiddlin' tits, start twiddlin' dials" Han'some bootler, booxoom cook Down in pantry havin' fook Opp in parlour mistress squeals "Stop fookin' cook, cook fookin' meals!" Little Frances home from school Picked oop baby by the tool Mother squealed "You naughty Frances To ruin baby's fookin' chances!" Ocean liner six days late Stoker strokin' stoker's mate Voice from captain over t'wire "Stop pokin' mate, start pokin' fire!"