The average unmarried female Basically insecure Due to some long frustration May react With psychosomatic symptoms Difficult to endure Affecting the upper respiratory tract In other words Just from waiting around For that plain little band of gold A person can develop a cold You can spray her Wherever you figure the strept-o-cocci lurk You can give her a shot for whatever shes got But it just won't work If shes tired of getting the fish-eye From the hotel clerk A person can develop a cold It says here The female remaining single Just in the legal sense Shows a nuerotic tendency See note, Note Chronic organic syndroms Toxic or hypertense Involving the eye, the ear, and the nose, and throat. In other words Just from wondering whether the wedding is on or off A person can develop a cough You can feed her all day with the Vitamin A And the bromo fizz But the medicine never gets anywhere Near where the trouble is If shes getting a kind of a name for herself And the name aint "his" A person can develop a cough And further more Just from stalling and stalling And stalling the wedding trip A person can develop La Grippe When they get on the train for Niagra And she can hear church bells chime The compartment is air conditioned And the mood sublime Then they get off at Saratoga For the 14th time A person can develop La Grippe La Grippe, La post nasil drip With the wheezes and the sneezes And a sinus that's really a pip From the lack of community property And a feeling shes getting too old A person can develop a big, bad, cold!
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