[1st verse:] There's no mistake that I can act I'm talented and that's a fact I know, because my mother told me so She kept a house for actor folks And listened to their funny jokes So now I guess my mother ought to know But managers are awful dense It seems to me they have no sense I know my darling mother wouldn't lie She thinks I'm better than the best But managers think I'm a pest And all they say is, "Go somewhere and die" [Refrain:] If the managers only thought the same as mother You bet I'd show them all a thing or three They'd have starred me in "The Thief" For it's mother's firm belief Margaret Illington could never steal like me If the Shuberts only took a tip from mother I'd be starring like a star was never starred Leslie Carter and that bunch Would be at Childs serving lunch If the managers only thought the same as ma [2nd verse:] My mother goes to all the shows She knows what ev'ry woman knows She knows Maude Adams knows a thing or two But when she saw her in that play She said to me that very day "My child, she doesn't know as much as you" So I got busy with my pen And wrote to Charlie Frohman then I asked him if he wouldn't star me quick His answer nearly knocked me dead For in his letter Charlie said "I didn't even know that you were sick" [2nd refrain:] If the managers only thought the same as mother I'd act like Sarah Bernhardt never did Harry Miller would forget Margret Anglin you bet He would want me as his real supporting kid If Frohman only took a tip from mother He would label me as Frohman's only star Missus Fiske would take a drop To some Broadway candy shop If the managers only thought the same as ma
https://primoaccordo.net/irving-berlin/if-the-managers-only-thought-the-same-as-mother.htm