I've never tasted tears Like these before And though they are the saddest I have known Their simple cause is none but One of joy For now it seems I may not be alone Upon this earth As I have been 'til now A truly unexpected twist of fate For I had given up On everyone Especially myself And thought it late Too late For any soul to cast a line His hook would hit the ice And snap in two But someone blew a kiss And with his breath Unfroze What ne'er a roaring fire could do An angel now is mine And from the start I knew that I was bound to let him in But while I smile I weep Because I know That something ends So that this can begin God, what a fool am I Or am I wise? For years have I kept hidden in my heart The name Of one who never had been more But whom I wrote about And set apart From other men Though never did I tell My feelings, nay But used him As a muse An inspiration Something to adore But rarely did I think on what I'd lose If ever My affections Were replaced By someone living Breathing Warm and real For while I pledged my life To him in song The same for me I knew he did not feel If I could tell the truth I'd say I planned To go on in this fashion For all time I didn't care He couldn't care for me As long as I could own him In each rhyme And have someone to think about Each night When torment After torment wracked my soul To writhe in sorrow Bathe in pain's delight To fill my pages Was my only goal Until the day I dared To call it love For this love Was the only I had known And somehow I could keep the rest away For in my mind I never was alone And being thus in love Though with a specter I never did expect Nor wish Nor care To take another In that holy place Though in my mind I knew no one was there Yay, in my mind But not so in my soul I loved I swear I loved Else why this pain When of my will I opened up the door And swept the space Where I swore he'd remain And something dies within me As I sweep As something new is born In every tear Past years of memories I long to keep A future That I both long for And fear There really was no question when it came This shooting star Both fire and gentleness Who never gave me time To make my choice But made my will His own with each caress For once And only once I did not think Where I should feel And for that I was proud But it was one thing to enact the part And something else To say the word aloud For once I had I felt A shadow fade Which over me had hung for all these years And no true loss In all the world could match The sense of someone Passing With my tears I hadn't known 'til then How lost I was Enveloped in this mist of my design So much of me My muse had thus become That in my eyes No star was seen to shine Unless it bore Some of my phantom's light Or carried strains of music in the beams Until my soul was open to the view No man could enter Except in my dreams It's over now And I am not afraid I know full well What I am meant to do But late at night When I recall my muse I cry for us As though he ever knew That I had waited years To hear my name Once spoken As it should have always been I'd wait there still But someone Real appeared And stole the heart No man could hope to win If to my muse I'd ever said hello It might not hurt this much to say Goodbye But there is something Tragic in this scene Which may appear As joyous to the eye Of anyone who witnesses myself Bound in the arms and lips Of my new friend Completed in a way I've never been And healing wounds I thought would never mend The truth That shattered my reality The soul I dreamed But never thought I'd meet And now I don't look back Except in dreams Yet when I do The pain Is always sweet For only pain can show me who I was And from that girl to me How much I've grown I've never tasted tears Like these before And yes They are the saddest I have known