the heaviness of my heart seems a burden to me - whatever they preach I have to look for people like me ans so I have to join the wrong unmindful of virtue I am eggier for the pleasure of love more than for salvation - I am seized by desire but I have to keep the darkness night hidden in the depth of my heart - it's the most bitter fate - fate is against me in love and virtue I am heartened by my promise I am downcast by my refusal there is nothing I need from anyone expect love and respect and anyone who can't give me those two things has no place in my life be sure before I'll finish - I intend to celebrate this hell I am involved in
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