I wanna be a lawyer Doctor or professor A member of the UMC I want an air conditioner Cottage on the river And all the money I can see I wanna drive a Lincoln Spend my evenings drinking The very best burgandy I want a yacht for sailing Private eye for tailing My wife if She's a bit too free I've been told ever since a boy that's what one aught to be A part of the UMC I want a pool to swim in Fancy suits to dress in Some stock in GM and GE An office in the city Secretary pretty Who'll take dictation on my knee I want a paid vacation Don't want to have to ration A thing with anyone but me And if there's war or famine Promise I'll examine The details if they're on TV I'll pretend to be liberal but I'll still support the GOP, As part of the UMC I wanna be a lawyer Doctor or professor A member of the UMC
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