I woke up yesterday morning Fell down two flights of stairs Well I thought I was wide awake but my legs were still asleep. Nine-one-one ambulance help me But I can't reach the phone So I scream to the neighbors Come over break into my home I broke my back There was nobody there to help me Broke my back All the lies and deception won't change the perception that I fell flat on my ass I wish this had happened skydiving That my parachute failed But a pair of shoes tripped me down stairs and I lay there and wail Those things I used to take for granted Now I take sitting down I can't brush my teeth, chew my nails, give the finger to a clown I broke my back And I can't even change the channels Broke my back I fell flat on my ass Well they tell me that I shouldn't get discouraged But they tell me that I'll never walk again And they say I'm gonna need alot of courage And they say I'm gonna need alot of friends But what I really need is a pair of electric legs. So I wish some genius would just invent them. And if they cost too much I'd share with someone else. Or I would scour the Yellow Pages and I'd rent them. I know I can probably pop a wheely Entertaining the kids I can put hockey cards in the spokes I can even throw skids I get a good seat at a concert Even get stuff for free Is it cause I'm an excellent guy or cause they're scared of me I broke my back And I can't even use the clapper I broke my back All the lies and deception won't change the perception that I fell flat on my ass