Performed by adam sandler, rob schneider, tim meadows, david spade, steve koren, tim herlihy, and margaret ruden [car approaches] Toll booth willie: welcome to worchester. dollar twenty-five please. M1: hey, how ya doin' toll booth willie? Toll booth willie: good! thanks fer askin, pop! M1: aww, that's great, you know, considering yer a fuckin' idiot! [pays toll and drives off] Toll booth willie: go fuck yourself you son of a bitch! I'll come right outta the booth and fuckin' whack ya, you fuckin' prick! [another car approaches] M2: hey, hey, willie! hows it going? Toll booth willie: hey, can't complain, pop. hows 'bout you? M2: oh, great, great. how much? Toll booth willie: the state charges a dollar twenty-five, pop. M2: that's fine. now should I give you the money, or should I shove the quarters directly up your fat ass!? [pays toll and drives off] Toll booth willie: why you fuckin' hard on! I'll fucking carlton fisk yer fuckin' head with a louise-ville fuckin' slugger! whadya think of that ass fuck!? [another car approaches] F1: hi willie. Toll booth willie: oh, nice to see ya m'am. not a bad day, huh? F1: well, I'm a little lost. could you help me out? I hear your the best with directions. Toll booth willie: well I know my way around new england. I can tell ya that much. so where ya headed? F1: well, I was just wondering exactly which is the best way to drive up your ass. you know, if you'd tell me, I'd appreciate it, you fuckin' prick. [drives off] Toll booth willie: you fuckin' bitch! fuck you! you forgot to pay the fuckin' toll you dirty whore! I'll fuckin' drop you with a boot to the fuckin' skull you cum guzzling queen! [another car approaches] M3: hey willie. Toll booth willie: hey, how are ya? M3: here's a dollar twenty-five, and go fuck yourself. [pays toll and drives off] Toll booth willie: dah, you fuckin' prick! I hope you choke on a fuckin' bottle cap, ya fuckin' son of a fuck! eat shit! eat my shit! [another car approaches] Bishop nelson: hello willie. good to see you. Toll booth willie: ahhh, bishop nelson. nice to see ya. that was quite a sermon you had the other day. Bishop nelson: hey, well I do my best. Toll booth willie: dollar twenty-five, bishop. Bishop nelson: dollar twenty-five, willie. isn't that the same price your mother charges for a blow job, you piece of dog shit!? [pays toll and drives off] Toll booth willie: ohhh! have another one, you fuckin' lush! it's not my fault the bartender cut ya off last night ya fuckin' douche bag! [another car approaches] M5: hey! Toll booth willie: well hey! M5: yeah, do you want the money, or should I just shove the quarters directly up your fat ass!? [pays toll and drives off] Toll booth willie: well, I already heard that one you fuckin' unoriginal bastard! go suck a corn you fuckin' piece of repeatin' shit! [another car approaches] F2: hi. Toll booth willie: oh, hi. how are ya? F2: fine, thank you. how much is the toll please? Toll booth willie: for you sweetheart, it's a dollar twenty-five. F2: here ya go. [pays toll] F2: thank you. [begins to drive off] Toll booth willie: hey! hey! honey! would you like a receipt with that? F2: oh, I almost forgot. thank you so much. [toll booth willie scribbling a receipt for her] Toll booth willie: and here ya are. F2: umm, do you think you could sign it? Toll booth willie: oh, uh.. sign it? F2: yeah, sign toll booth willie was here. Toll booth willie: ok, sure. uhh, by the way, what is this for? [signing receipt] F2: just so I could have proof for my friends that I met the biggest fuckin' dip shit with the smallest dick alive. you understand. [drives off] [crumples up paper] Toll booth willie: fuck you, you fuckin' upity bitch! I'll fuckin' fuck you and all your lesbian fish-eating friends in front of your fuckin' mothers! you're gonna die, bitch! I'm comin' o The booth! [opens the door and runs out of the booth] [car screeches and hits him] Toll booth willie: ooooh! my fuckin' leg! M6: hey! you ran over toll booth willie! M7: oh my god! I was always wondering what it would be like to run over a Dried up stinky dick licker. Toll booth willie: why you fuckin' pricks. I fuckin' hear every fuckin' word yer saying! when this fuckin' leg heals, I'm gonna kick you guys new fuckin' assholes! [everyone cussing eachother out]
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